Mine is Zippy Chickenfanny ?????????

THIS IS FUNNY--TRY IT!!!
Here is your dose of humor... Follow the instructions to find your new name. Once you have your new name, put it in the comment box. The following in an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants" by Dave Pilkey. The evil professor forces everyone to assume new names......

Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:

a = poopsie b = lumpy c = buttercup

d = gadget e = crusty f = greasy

g = fluffy h = cheeseball i = chim-chim

j = stinky k = flunky l = bootie

m = pinky n = zippy o = goober

p = doofus q = slimy r = loopy

s = snotty t = tootie u = dorkey

v = squeezit w = oprah x = skipper

y = dinky z = zsa-zsa

Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of yournew last name:

a = apple b = toilet c = giggle

d = burger e = girdle f = barf

g = lizard h = waffle i = cootie

j = monkey k = potty l = liver

m = banana n = rhino o = bubble

p = hamster q = toad r = gizzard

s = pizza t = gerbil u = chicken

v = pickle w = chuckle x = tofu

y = gorilla z = stinker

Use the fourth letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:

a = head b = mouth c = face

d = nose e = tush f = breath

g = pants h = shorts i = lips

j = honker k = butt l = brain

m = tushie n = biscuits o = hiney

p = chunks q = toes r = buns

s = fanny t = sniffer u = sprinkles

v = kisser w = squirt x = humperdinck

y = brains z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is Goober Chickenshorts.William Jefferson Clinton is Bootie Liverbiscuits.