Thursday, December 16, 2010

Butt, Mom!!!!

I feel a little sheepish with my title, because it isn't a term we freely use in the Munson fam-il-y, but it very much suits this post.

I can't tell you how many times a day I hear "but MO-om" as my children whine about how starVING they are or how much they want to watch a movie or some other trivial thing. Seriously, my children as for food so many times per day you would seriously think I never feed them. On the other hand, I feel like all I do is feed them and wipe their "boonies". The term that we have endearingly used since Hayden could speak and couldn't get the "t" sound for bootie.

Anyway, so today I dropped off Hayden at school and decided to do one errand that I didn't want to put off too much longer due to the long lines that I am sure will start forming in the customer service booths across America. I needed to return two things. Errands like these usually give me the hives just thinking of them, and what MAY occur during the meant-to-be-quick errand. Throw in two antsy 3 year olds and you must be prepared for anything.

So we pull up to Walmart. That in itself can gives me hives. Not that there is anything particularly wrong with Walmart. It just always seems overcrowded with people in a panic or those who are past the panic and are now in the "bulldoze anyone in my way" mode.  It's quite frightening. And that is just if you make it in the door without being run-over by any of the said panickers in their vehicles.  

Sidenote: At one point during our trip they announced on the overhead that a small child, three years old, was missing. Please come to the front to claim her. Seconds later I see a woman and man talking frantically and the woman had that " I just lost my child and need her back RIGHT NOW" look on her face. I also heard her mention three years old. I'm thinking Woman! Did you not just hear!??  So I say, " Are you missing a child, three years old? They have her at the front. Did you hear the overhead?" She looks at me now panicked AND confused and says, "No, I'm looking for size 3 Tights." Sorry, can't help ya there, unless Ella, do you want to donate yours that you are wearing??  I was a bit shocked at the urgency she had on her face for tights. Hopefully the other mom that is missing the child isn't wondering around the store calmly browsing through the light bulb section.


ANYWAY, back to the beginning......We walk in and since the return items are small I opt to forgo the cart until we are finished with the return. The twins each picked a small toy from our treasure toy box/extend-o closet, i.e. THE CAR.  , to bring with them into the store. So we make the return, after waiting for about 10 minutes. The girls dropping and picking up the toys, stuffing them and unstuffing them into my purse, making friends with a man in line, hugging his legs, me being horrified, giving them the stranger danger talk , and of course, every person in the line asking if they were twins. Sigh.

You'd think that was enough, but NO! I thought, lets browse the store. Maybe we can finish up some shopping we haven't gotten to yet. I grab us a cart, Ella picks the front seat and Preslyn picks the basket. I figured this was a bad idea because Preslyn is a notorious basket-riding-stander-upper. But I didn't feel like arguing with them if I tried to switch or deal with the flood of tears waiting to pour.  So we slowly wandered up the center aisles where all the impulse Christmas gifts were. I stop at this one bin to look at something for Hayden and am looking at it and reading and Preslyn calls to me, "Mom, do I have a pullup on?" I look over and Preslyn is standing in the basket, with her jeans and diaper around her knees. Her "Boonie" just glowing in the florescent Walmart lights. I was so tickled I could barely scold her. It was so shocking and hilarious. 

Like I said. I have to be prepared for anything. And I am never prepared for the crazy things these girls pull.
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